Title adapted from "Forward Motion" - Album: Two Lefts Don't Make A Right, But Three Do. Artist: Relient K
Change of mood. Time for a serious blog.
Life seems a bit stagnant at the moment. Don't get me wrong, socially it's been great. In fact, I'm hardly ever home, and when I am I'll often have somebody over. Probably the most social I've ever been would be this year - hands down (lol, I love that phrase). Been cool. Other than that it's been packed with family gatherings, Tafe, birthdays, medical symposiums, going to the footy, house-sitting...so whilst it's been nutso busy, it also seems to be on a bit of a standstill.
I guess I'm talking mostly about life on a more career basis, as well as the future in general. As seen in previous blogs, I have some big dreams (missions, professional actress, children's psychologist, starting a family & adopting kids from all over the globe).
I aim high.
What frustrates me is that I don't do anything about it. And I don't know how to get there. It's like waiting for the waiter to bring you your meal, exactly what you want, without ordering. I know nothing will happen if I don't get off my butt and do something about it, yet I still expect that mind-reader waiter to bring that perfect meal, without speaking a word to them, even though I know it's impossible.
Does that make sense?
Honestly, I used to be afraid of time moving forward, getting older and change; and I still am sometimes. But I think now it's not so much just the time moving on, it's that it'll move on and I'll remain standing still.
Why don't I do anything?
I don't know.
That's the silly thing.
Then there's doubting what I want for my future. Maybe that's a reason I don't do anything? For example, I plan to leave my course next year and transfer into Liberal Arts, then a year or 2 after that transfer into Psychology at Uni. I'm afraid that I'll finally get there and find that it's not what I want at all.
I'm not sure I know what I want. Hmm. Bit scary I suppose? Yes. Yes it is.
"Cos forward motion is harder than it sounds..."
Is it?
Maybe we're just lazy.
Maybe we're just too afraid to make mistakes.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
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5 comments:
duno if u want advice, but here comes some anyway.
im young, you're young! we get so impatient..
that's all
haha
i don't have any concluding thoughts. that is it!
anyway
:)
ben
thanks ben :) course! advice is always welcome :)
Mistakes ARE a time-consuming and often painful thing. However, it's what we do with them/learn from them after the fact that show our mettle as humans and followers of Christ.
Dig in, girlfriend. Seek the maker and trust His empowerment of your judgement. He will make it clear, and even though you think you can't hear Him... he's still whispering directions. :)
yo. yeh man i feel that.. i guess its a similiar kind of post to 'for what its worth' that i wrote a while ago.
its good zaria, ur making progress because u actually have goals and are thinking abiut them... alot of people dont even get that far.
cheerio :)
dave
the big question... what to do? mmmmmm... pity the answer cant be EVERYTHING! =[
yah, dave says good point. that ur thinking about it and that it bothers you is important in actually moving in them. so practical small steps are useful, like, read up on whats going on mission wise in ur countires of interest, then volunteer a 1/2 day a week at a kiddy place, see if if it doesnt drive u nuts before u commit to studying for it etc etc...
mm, theres my two bob.
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